I'll Protect You

“Show me that you're real and not just my own madness”

― Alexandra Monir, Timeless

Milo awoke with a start. He had the dream again He sat up, looking around the room which looked so startlingly different than his dream. His body was drenched in sweat and his heartbeat was in frenzy.. He reached around to where his right arm used to be. All that was left was half of his shoulder and scars. They felt smooth beneath his fingers and it reminded him of that day. 

~~~~

Milo and Tristan had been best friends since Milo could remember. 

“Milo..who are you talking to?” Milo’s mother asked. Her face was contorted in confusion. 

“Mommy I’m talking to Tristan!” Milo would say, a smile plastered across his face. Tristan would wave at Milo’s mother. But she couldn’t see him. “Oh your imaginary friend?” She asked. “No, Mommy he’s real. He’s right here.” But she brushed it off. He was only six, of course it was an imaginary friend. 

When Milo was thirteen they went to the beach. Like always, Tristan would come along. His family always thought of Milo as a loner. They didn’t want to believe he was crazy, they told themselves he was quiet and soft-spoken.  While everyone else was making sandcastles Tristan and Milo would put their feet in the wet sand and let the waves wash over them.  “Come on Milo let’s go for a swim!!” Tristan said encouragingly. Tristan ran farther into the water and swam underneath it. Milo laughed at him, thinking he was crazy. Several minutes passed before Tristan came back up and Milo became worried. He jumped in after his friend.  He swam farther into the water, but couldn’t see Tristan. He couldn’t see the shadow that loomed behind him. The bull shark was fast, bumping into him first. His body spun and swayed as he became disoriented. The shark attacked, grabbing on to Milo’s arm it shook him violently. Milo tried his best to fight back, kicking and punching the shark. Finally the shark ripped Milo’s arm away and swam off. Blood turned the water a deep dark red and Milo was convinced he was going to die. Everything started to go black. He could only see bits and pieces of the world around him. He could feel arms grabbing him. He could feel his lungs taking in oxygen when they finally reached the shore. He could he the screaming in the distance. The last thing he saw was Tristan looking down at him, his face pale and then finally Tristan vanished. As if he never existed.  

After all the blood Milo lost, he somehow still survived. All the Doctors were perplexed and all his family was curious to know who had saved him. Milo tried to tell them over and over. “It was Tristan! It was Tristan! I swear it was him!” But no one believed him. He never saw Tristan again after that day. 

~~~~

Milo hated the dream, because it wasn’t a dream. It was a memory that replayed over and over in his head. It was more like a living nightmare. For some reason he was having the dream more than usual. He was also beginning to miss Tristan more than usual. He would see someone with Tristan’s dark hair and would have to glance twice. After all these years his heart still hurt. He didn’t know what this feeling was inside his stomach. It would bubble up whenever he thought of him. He would tell himself it’s just because he missed him, but deep down he knew it was more than that. Him and Tristan used to be so close, Tristan was his only friend. He got out of bed and shivered. The heat wasn’t on and he was only wearing his boxers. He cursed on the way to the bathroom. When he got out of the bathroom, Tristan was sitting on his bed. Milo jumped back, screaming some as he did. He tried blinking once and then again, but Tristan was still sitting there. He had on a black dress shirt and was wearing black jeans. His hair was longer than Milo remembered. Tristan got up from the bed and made he was over to Milo. “Hello old friend.” He said smiling. Milo couldn’t believe it was him. It couldn’t have been, everyone told him he wasn’t real. He was just an imaginary friend! “Are-are you real?” Milo stuttered in disbelief. Tristan nodded. “But..But you can’t be.” Tristan looked down at himself before patting his chest and legs. “Hm..well I certainly feel real.” Milo couldn’t help but laugh. Even in hard times, Tristan could always cheer him up. Milo gives Tristan a quick hug with his arm. As if he’d been waiting for it, Tristan hugs Milo back. “I missed you.” Milo whisper’s into Tristan’s shoulder. “I missed you too.” Tristan says back. When they pull apart Tristan has a pained look on his face, as if he’s holding back tears. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get to you before…before..” Tristan is looking down at where Milo’s right arm used to be. “It’s okay, I’ve always been a lefty anyway.” He laughs, trying to lighten the subject. Tristan hugs Milo this time, it’s a tight embrace that catches Milo off guard. When he pulls away Tristan looks deep into Milo’s eyes. They stay like that for several minutes and milo can barely breathe. “I’m sorry I left you..” Tristan finally says. “After what happened..I had to go away for  a while. Figure some things out..” He says looking away. “What things? I’ve wondered all this time if you were really real. Everyone says I’m crazy. I even have a therapist now. Her name is Brenda.” Milo says. “What are you Tristan?” Milo says after a short pause. Tristan looks back up at Milo. It takes him a minute. “I’m..I’m your protector.” He says finally. Milo’s eyebrows knit together in confusion. “Protector? Like my guardian angel?” He asks. “Yeah, something like that. You see the problem is that when you’re a protector, you cannot by any circumstances let your charge see you. You saw me right from the get go Milo. I don’t know why or how, but It’s unheard of.” Tristan says running his hand through his hair nervously. “So I got scolded for that and that’s why I’ve been gone so long..I was put on probation from protecting you.” Milo could barely take all of this in. “They had Carmen watching after you. Until I came back.” Milo was trying his best to keep up. “Carmen? Whose Carmen? I haven’t seen anyone around lately.” Milo says putting his hand in his pocket. “That’s because you couldn’t see Carmen. You can only see me..” He says. “Why is that?” Milo asks. Tristan swallowed before speaking. “I think it’s because we’re connected somehow..” He says, his face turning pink. Milo’s stomach began to explode as if it turned into a million butterflies. “So why are you back now? Why isn’t Carmen still..uh..protecting me?” He asks. Tristan bites his lip, briefly glancing down at Milos mouth. “It’s because I had to see you. I broke the rules Milo. All of them. I wasn’t supposed to still be watching you after I was on probation, but I did. I wasn’t supposed to come back here and see you, but I did.  Milo…I..I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you..but I did.” Tristan said. His face was red and he looked at Milo expectantly. Milo let the words sink in. It felt like the sun shining on his skin after he’d been in a shadow.  It was warm and sweet. Without thinking, Milo leaned up and kissed Tristan hard on the mouth. Everything he’d been feeling poured into that kiss. His loneliness without Tristan there, his anger of Tristan leaving, his desire of seeing him again. Tristan kissed him back with all the same force. He ran his hands through Milo’s hair, occasionally grasping hold of it, not wanting to let go of Milo ever again. When they finally parted ways Tristan laughed. Milo’s breath was coming fast and his heart beat was out of control. “I’m such a Rebel. I’ve broken another rule.” Tristan said smiling, his face red. “I just can’t believe it. I’m so glad your real and I’m so glad your back.” Milo said, holding back his tears. He never cried, not even when the shark took his arm. “I’m so glad to be back. I promise I’ll never leave you. I don’t care what he rules say. I’ll protect you till the day I die.”